Life is indeed a mystery. To some extent at least. I haven't lived "too" long here on earth to claim i have the authority to give a "world class" commentary on the concept of life but i know too well a few things that can help us unravel some of these 'unknowns'. Some things happen the way they do and we often wonder why. Somethings seem to be following a certain order to them and even the most seasoned atheist will acknowledge that humanity exists by design not by mere chance (as Post-modernists and Darwinists of this world wouldl have us believe). Of late i have had a personal experience with this natural order of things.

There are some people i meet and i wonder if we will ever really strike up a conversation of sorts. Its not that these people are unlikable or anything but i just can't bring myself near them! There is a chasm separating us and i imagine its going be pretty hard making a connection. I don't even see any way such is going happen. Now i have had this experience many times but as it turned out, i was wrong every inch of the way! Let me tell you how.

There are three people at my workplace that i honestly thought we would never connect. But today i will only talk about Jennie (not real name). She dresses like a pro on Monday to Thursday and come Friday, she gets a "dress down" (gets casual here, as is fitting on Friday's). The fact that she is, i suppose 3, 4 years my senior makes her kinda "intimidating". She is dead serious. Or at least she 'looks'. At your first glance, boy, you don't want to cross her path. She's been here long enough, and hey, u just made your debut at work only yesterday! She is focused, sounds/looks principled and doesn't even seem to recognize you are around. Now that is Jennie..or i should say, that 'was'. I keep my distance for a while. I'm convinced our paths won't cross at any one point You don't want to bump into such people lest.... Trust me i don't remember how this happens but somehow along the way Jennie turns out to be a very different person from who i thought she was. She is not as "serious" (mark the quotes please). She is even not as stony silent, confined and seemingly "difficult".....she can jazz...she can smile at people...she now even says hello in the morning....and ooops we are at the moment working on the same project where she is a second line supervisor.How strange! Now thats the irony in life . Anyone with the same story?

Its pretty interesting how the month of May has "zoomed" by almost unnoticed. And yet there was everything to make it "drag". I guess its natural for time to pass "quickly" when all is going roses. That's the strange bit about May because its not been short of drama and shortcomings. I can hardly point any one day when I've woken up in the morning and it was "all clear". Its been quite difficult to live life in recent days but hey, thank God I've kept on my two's all this while. Work goes on. I don't know how to describe it. Leaving all factors constant i would not have alot good to talk about work but i will choose to focus on the good side of things today. Maybe a little bit of the "other side" along the way, if necessary. I call that getting real. I guess all things happen for a reason (purpose if you like). I mean there is always a reason for everything that happens here on earth simply because we don't live life in isolation..there is a God somewhere. And this God has many a time parted me on the back during those "rainy" days and prompted me to give him thanks in ALL things (specifically in the thick of those unattractive moments when the sky is all gray and doom and gloom are staring hard in my face). This is not like an escape route from reality but an act of faith where we acknowledge that God is in charge and in his own right time, he makes all things beautiful. So I've tried not to focus alot on how boring, repetitive and mechanical (manual?) work has become but instead look out for all the beautiful things about it. For example the expertise, experience, and exposure etc being gained. I guess that's the fun of it.

Otherwise i hope you found it memorable reading my 3 part series dedicated to the life and legacy of Paul Kwikiriza. Can't wait to hear from you. Post your comments by clicking below on the 'comments' link which will pop up a window. You can sign in as a Gmail user (if you have an account with gmail, that is) or optionally select 'Name/URL' (the URL is optional) to be able to publish your comments. OpenID settings are also available.

PAUL KWIKIRIZA: Final Reflections

Looking back over the life of my departed friend, you could as well say i have mixed reactions. The day a friend told me Paul had passed, it was a hard pill to swallow. Looks like the whole world came to a stand still and there i was- almost motionless. "It surely couldn't be", i told myself. I wished it could be false but truth and reality always have a way of asserting themselves. You never run away from them and take a hiding. Somehow it dawned on me i had to learn to live in a Paul-less world. At the same time i felt Paul had had to endure alot of Pain- unbearable pain i should say, and maybe God had decided to relieve him of it. Just like everyone else who has known him, i had all these questions running through my mind. And the biggest one was why should such a brilliant fellow die at such a tender age?? He was full of potential and you it didn't take you long to realize he was destined for great things. But there he was on that Wednesday evening April 30 lying quietly in that grave. Gone.Really.

I believe Paul still lives with us in the legacy he left behind. He certainly accomplished his alloted work here on earth. So according to God, he had no business here any longer! I'm convinced he is in a much better place. I remember vividly a comment made by one of my friends on learning of Paul's death. She said, "...at least he lived his life straight". Interesting. One of the many lessons i learned throughout this entire experience is to live my life wisely as if it's my very last. Do you think you have more of a right to live than Paul had? No you don't and neither do i. So every morning you wake up alive,don't ever take it for granted.Appreciate all those around you given the opportunity because today could be the last day you could let them know you love them.

Adieu my friend.

PAUL KWIKIRIZA: A Tribute (PART 3)

Nine moths at REC seemed only but a moment. They seemed to have passed by so quickly. Probably because we were busy most of the time and naturally couldn't notice the sluggishness in the passing of time. Work was moving on quite well. But it wasn't all about work. Paul, I and our friends often got together for the youth fellowship at St. James Cathedral. It was fun. Of course, being in such meaningful fellowships not only created deeper relationship with God, but stronger friendships as well. I reckon Paul was our fellowship leader. This guy oozed with special and natural abilities of leadership. and you can be sure during his time, "fello", as we fondly referred to it, was the place to be every Wednesday and Sunday. I also recall going on an outreach ministry with this gentleman somewhere at the outskirts of Mbarara in a Muslim school (Nyamitanga, think) where we talked to young people and shared experiences with them. He played the guitar that day and we sung our our hearts out. I now look back at those days with immense nostalgia.

Soon after, it was time for our UACE results to be released. Anxiety ate through us. We had prayed and believed God for "super" A's or at least B's. Now was the time to face off with reality. Paul was always his confident self. He was sure he would go for his MBchB. I don't know how best to describe the aftermath of our results being released. We hadn't got the A's we so much craved and prayed for. Quite naturally, we were jaded in our souls. We had believed. We had prayed. We had fasted. And somehow, things turned out the way they did. i should mention at this point we didn't fail. Leaving all factors constant, we had done well. But peharps we had set high standards for ourselves (realistic standards i should say) but looks like God had other plans. The best plans, so we encouraged ourselves. Maybe it was a period of great thought for my dear friend because in his own projections, it seemed like his dream of becoming a doctor was now hanging on the line, more than ever. But this soul always tried not to get "under" things and instead get "over" them. He later discovered he was never going to be a doctor, anyway. But he kept his head up high.Always believing.

Just before the end of our long vacation, it was confirmed Paul would have to settle for an engineering course at University. He amazingly adjusted to this and was soon telling me how he looked forward to being the best engineer he could be. Studying Automotive and Power Engineering at Kyambogo University proved to be such an illustrious project because it was a rather new course and i imagine quite marketable in many aspects.

In September 2004, i parted ways with my friend. We had been together for such a long time and it seemed campus with all its "dynamics" would try hard to keep us apart. Moreover we were going to study in different Universities. We kept in touch though, but i must confess not so often. Our lives seemed to have changed in some sense and now it was all about books and careers. University was never going to be a luxurious yacht ride but on the contrary, a challenging and as we later found out, a difficult one. Apart from meeting Paul during the holiday,we found it hard for us to hook up on any other time. But we always knew the all important fact that friends are forever. Whenever we happened to meet, we just began from where we had stopped previously!

I sadly discovered one day Paul had some heart complications, hirtheto unknown to me. But i remember him telling me he was asthmatic, way back in vacation. I could never have connected the two because it really didnt look like it. When it was decided he had to be taken for surgery in India, that is in 2007, we prayed that God sails him through. And he did. I got to meet Paul i think 4 months after his heart surgery at his home. By that time i was trying to wrap up with University. Though he looked weak physically, on the inside he was the Paul i always knew - full of life and vitality. He surely would pull through this and get back to study (he was almost a year behind schedule at this point). Its as if we were going down memory lane because we talked about everything we could and allowed ourselves reminisces of the days gone by! True he went back to Campus to our great joy the following semester.Later on in the year, i learned Paul had developed more problems with his condition and was back in Hospital. Bad news indeed. With time it became more and more clear that my friend's heart problem was more serious than i had thought. I began to wonder what would become of him. Would he ever completely get over this? Or he would have to endure it the rest of his life? Or he..would never make it, anyway?? The last question, i dismissed harshly whenever it surfaced and earnestly asked God to spare this guy's life.

Just like a month before he was to be flown to India for a second heart operation , i had a phone conversation with Paul. It was great hearing that familiar joyful sound again. I apologized for having been "off the radar" for long but assured him i always prayed and thought about him. While i told my self i would get to see him in the near future, somehow this didnt happen because soon after he was flown to India at the end of April where he was to endure a grueling 2nd surgery. I have been in theater before (albeit for a simple matter compared to Paul's) and wondered how it "felt" having your chest knifed...really awful. And as it turned out on the morning of Saturday April 24 2008, that phone call was the last i would ever make to Paul. He died just before the operation and went to be with the Lord.

PAUL KWIKIRIZA: A Tribute (PART 2)

Just like every other person in A' level Form 6 in the year 2003, Paul and i sat for our UACE - what i call the epoch of academic endeavor in secondary school. Of course one is bound to have all the nerves in the world at such a critical stage of examination but thank God we pulled through. Very soon, long vacation was knocking on our doors and...pheeew! 1 2 3 4 5 6....9 months of uninterrupted, non-stop holiday making! At first glance its such a welcome idea but the prospect of being home for that long aint that cool after all, moreso for a growing teenager with serious "ambitions"! Personally i dreaded being in mama's sight for that long so i sought after various avenues of work.

Its January 2004 and we are seated in this rather sizable room at Ruharo Eye Center(REC)....all nerves. We have an interview before us and i can pick out many familiar faces. Paul is among them and as usual, wearing his characteristic confident self as if certain of a guaranteed offer. The problem is they need only three out of a multitude of people who have showed up here this morning. The rest is history. All i remember is that the following morning i discovered to my great delight i, Paul and a certain friend (Maggie) had been offered jobs!This was more than just a stroke of luck; God must have pulled some strings somewhere!!!!Exciting indeed.

The following 9 months at REC were no doubt memorable and heavily eventful. You can call that a period of transition for the three of us because we were earning our first salary and rubbing shoulders with revered medical practitioners. The burden of expectation hung over us because it seems, having been picked out of a big lot, it was assumed we had quite alot to offer. Paul fit in the "system" so quickly. I would say he was "tailor made" for this job because this is where he always wanted to be: in a hospital. You could tell he loved his work and he really made the rest of us especially me look mediocre! And yet i admired him lots for that. While me and Maggie worked directly with patients in OPD, Paul was stationed somewhere in the Labs meaning he did his work quietly (free from the prying eyes of supervisors) and i should add, so efficiently.

A typical day at work began at 8 Am meaning one had to be up well before. Once in a while , we hiked lifts (in Paul Dad's car)..that is on a "good" day. Most of the time we had to walk to our work place because it was really near our homes. I had never been as close to Paul as i was during this period. We often "hooked" up at lunch breaks and caught up on many things. Paul was immensely passionate about Football. I reckon he could mention the entire Arsenal first IX without blinking an eye. And when it got to our favorite subject (u can bet its music), time seemed to pass a little more quickly because we evidently had alot to talk about in this regard. While my favorite genre was contemporary gospel, Paul loved his music slow and "sentimental". It would never take you long to figure out who his best artistes were - people like Ray Boltz, Don Moen and of course, Ron Kenoly. Ive always thought his favorite song was 'I Pledge Allegiance' done by the legendary Ray Boltz. Even to this day whenever that song is played or sung, my mind races to Paul because in a way, it was his "signature track". This guy loved the Lord and would never trade him for a thing. When you looked "through" him, you could see a fire; a burning zeal to serve God at all costs. No wonder Ray Boltz proved so relevant.

On our way back home every evening, we got to talk more about the personal bit of us. Talk of family, friends, the struggles we were going through, bla bla. In this way, we encouraged ourselves and admonished each other. Having grown up the only male at home, Paul proved to be a worthy brother. At last i wasn't having whining and tantrum-throwing sisters all over me but a male and masculine "dimension" to "things". You can be sure he sharpened me in very many ways. We often told ourselves we were going to make it to university and live out our dreams. On those long walks home, we peeped into the future and allowed ourselves to imagine how our wives and children would be like (but especially WHO our wives would be!!). I got to see a different Paul from probably what the world saw. Here he was....not looking clergy and authoritative anymore but a down-to-earth, pleasant fella...human; with fears and expectations just like the rest of us. I should also peharps mention he knew the value of saving money. While i was prolific at spending my obviously meager "salary", Paul had a more cautious approach. He would save his money and spend it all once by purchasing something tangible. As you can see, i definitely had a lot to learn from this exceptional soul!!

PAUL KWIKIRIZA: A Tribute (PART 1)

Music filled the air and it was just about the perfect atmosphere one could have on a Saturday. Young men and women trotted about neatly clad in their school uniforms as they made their way to a nearby large shelter. The Mcee is was evidently having a good time. What followed was a fest if you like....everyone was soon on their feet dancing happily to some sweet melodies. Memorable.Unforgettable.

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The year is 1999 and we are at Ntare School. Its the annual Scripture Union Conference. For many of us, the event of the year, no doubt. At that time i was in Mbarara High School, just a few Kilometers from Ntare. You can call the two neighbors. And in those years not really "good" neighbors i must say. Flashback to those infamous fights during football games and you suddenly get to know what im talking about.But still we always managed to find our way to each other's campus. I was 14 then and in my Senior Two. I had friends at Ntare i reckon.Good friends. The enmity and rivalry between our schools just didn't mean a thing.Talk of people like Edgar (Kangere), Enoch ("Kagame"), Clever, the Sande's (I and II) and of course Paul. I connected with all these fellas because we all had a passion for music. It really brought us together. Paul was a genius. Even before i knew what Key F was, this guy did. He played Piano like a virtuoso and i really admired him. No doubt he in a way inspired me a great deal to go ahead and learn Piano the following year. Clad in his khaki shorts and white shirt, Paul looked so young..so innocent. He always had a smile for everyone. Peharps i should also mention he loved his God. In those days, RADICAL for Christ was the "inthing" and Paul was its true embodiment.

In the subsequent years, we got to meet more often...in conferences both at school and regional level. Actually in the 1990's regional conferences used to take place quite alot at Mbarara High School(MHS) and these always (as they still do i believe) lasted 4 -5 days. That would always be just enough to spend more time with my friends, including Paul; free from the confines and limitations that come with being in school. I have never forgotten one conference evening in July 2000 when Paul walked on stage and together with the other two gentlemen (Evans and Sande II) did Lenny Le Blanc's 'As We Draw Near To You' a beautiful song with a beautiful melody. I was immeasurably blessed. Here was this guy, with guitar in hand doing his thing like a pro but so graciously and with conviction. I considered him multi faceted. He seemed to know and do all things!

The fact that he excelled at his UCE im sure didn't come as a surprise. He always told me how he wished to be a doctor one day. And maybe his dream was just well on the course of fulfillment because he opted for the sciences in A' level majoring in the area i personally dreaded most- Physics, chemistry, Biology and Maths. But still the heavy schedule and extra hard work that comes with A level didn't faze this soul. He kept his confident self, always willing to take on important unacademic responsibilities. Just like me, he was the Music director for the Scripture Union choir. Over the holiday, as i used to keep around Ruharo Mbarara quite alot, i also got to know his family which also stayed in the same area. One would have described me then as liberal and then gone on to label Paul a "conservative" but this disparity i should say made us much better friends. For example while he loved to have himself dressed all gentle, i on the other hand preferred my jeans and tees. He would dress so neatly and could pass for clergy.I must confess at times he looked older than his age because he carried himself like an "oldie"...with that aura and air of authority about him. That was Paul for you. The "In-Your-Face" type who didnt mince words in telling you how wrong you were if that is what he believed. My friends Apollo (Karugaba) and Patience (Karazarwe) can testify on this.

Its been a mixed week. Now that today is saturday i can look back and peharps have something to write. Someone said Life's good..Live it. But what about when life is no more and we have nothin else to live for? Exactly last week, i bet i had one of the worst weekends. My long time time friend - PAUL KWIKIRIZA went to be with the Lord. That was on the morning of Saturday April 26 in Chennai India where his soul succumbed to heart complications. He was pending his second heart operation in a space of 8 months. On Wednesday, we solemnly buried his remains at his home in South Western Uganda, Ibanda district. No doubt a very sad day but one to remember. I have since then told myself Paul didnt die, he just slept and as his body lies in that seemingly eternal sleep...im sure his spirit rejoices as it strolls through the lush green beautiful meadows of paradise. Free from all the pain he had to endure...yes, free atlast. Im constantly reminded of that famous classic by country legend, John Reeves - This World Is Not My Home. Sure. He couldn't have been more right. On earth, we are just passing through..yes, on our way home.

Sitting on the church pew in St. James Cathedral Mbarara Wednesday afternoon, it dawned on me we weren't just mourning our dear friend, we were celebrating his life, albeit short. The learned and eloquent bishop of Ankole diocese , Dr. Tibesigwa in his eulogy described Paul as "well balanced and well intergrated". A truly multi-talented and enormously gifted fellow indeed.

At roughly 5 PM that evening, we laid Paul to rest at his parents' home in Ibanda. Peharps many were amazed at the composed demeanor the parents had that day. I quietly admired them. This wasn't a suppression of emotion. These wonderful people gathered the strength to eulogise and bury their departed in the most admirable way. And i pray that this inner strength i believe God alone gives, sails them through this time of apparent loss.

We got back to Kampala that very day. We reached in the morning of Thursday 1 AM. A really really long ride. Thank God he kept each of us in one piece because we were absolutely worn out.

Over the next week, i will set out to write a three part special series as a tribute to Paul Kwikiriza. I had the opportunity to share countless many things with this wonderful soul and i will attempt to let you into the life we lived and shared beginning with our early school days in the late 1990's and the eventful latter years.

Keep it at The 'E' Xperience.